Friday, March 31, 2006

My 101st post.

HELP!! The Media has figured out the key to getting terrorist to talk...
Chanell 7!! Now normally I adore PBS but today...well my cable box is STUCK ON 7!!!
I mean STUCK ON!! I can not even turn off the box...
the remote must be changing the neighbors chanelles because it no longer works on my TV!!
How did they do it???

So a call to the cable company...."return the box to your nearest cable store for a replacement."
HELLLLOOOOO!!! Do I not pay them to help here? It is a real pain in the butt to laod up sick babies and go on this type of trip. Not to mention the line I have to wait in....... reality


Well it appears that dad and Heidi are busy picking on each other...Erica I can not post comments on your post...Anna I do like you so better in comes in many shades too....and well I am borred with nothing to do and nothing new to read.......

Thursday, March 30, 2006

March 30 2006 (maybe)

Well it is Thursday morning...a bit late formynormal post but the paper had to be read...nothing of interest in it realy...just the front page with a picture of the monsterous power poles Chugiach has errected up Northern Lights....This my freinds has people in this area pretty upset...not your normal power pole...but BIG RUSTY Ugly ones....kills the view of Mt. Mckinnley on a clear the power company says they had to go big...height restrictions for live wires make it so...cant put the cables undergraound...takes to long to respond and fix a problemm...not to mention in the process of errecting the things they broke a gas line and we had issues there for two days.
I understand the need tosupply power to our continously growing community but asthetic beauty goes a long way too...could we not have some the Girl Scouts volenteer their time to "Paint" these . blend them into the enviroment a bit.... Now lets discuss security of these poles...watching them errect them...they dug a hole about twenty feet deep...filled it with concrete and a "base" ( another long pole that sits into the hole and has a platform with four BIG bolts on top) using a sky crane they then mounted the BIGGER pole to the base...securing it guessed it four nuts.....Now the average house hold does not have a tool big enough to turn these monster size nuts....but I do not live in the average husband just happened to purchase for 350 dollars mind you....a socket has only 2 sockets in it but I can fit my fist into one of guess is this socket will fit those if I can get hold of a tool to remove a nut that guess is anyone how can they garentee me that some idiot with no common sense about electricity...(a boy scout?) will not decided these are ugly too and begin the disassebly process.......just a thought to ponder.....

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

A new link

I have moved my "political views" to another blog will be linked to this one when my personal assistant "dinker" has finished with the lay out. I am continueing to blog my family and fiction on this views on life will be posted on the for now you can visit the new page by going through my profile and selecting the page.

Oh Where Did All the Crabs Go!!

A few years ago, okay so it was more than a few...but who's counting. Kachamak Bay was crawling with crabs...Dungie's, Kings, and Opis could be found in the average shrimp pots that were placed around the Bay. I can recall my father and his crew going Halibut fishing...yes us kids stayed home under the watchful eye of "the BIG sister." Upon the adults return home a seafood supper would be held...clams, crab, shrimp and halibut IF the fishermen were lucky. Now for those that know my mixed up family...Heidi and I DO NOT like after a very long day of fighting over who is in charge of who we were not even rewarded with pizza...just fish.

Now I do believe that many times the adults probably consumed crab out of season and probably were a bit paronoid of being caught but who in their right mind would turn one back if it happened into a legal shrimp pot? Crab populations of Kachamak Bay were so abundant that my father and uncle once told me when the "undesirables" show up...such as unwanted boy friends and spouses...they were often taken "fishing" and never returned...the crabs and other bottom feeders would take care of the evidence left by any over exuberant fisherman who happened to fall into the water. Remember the prison system we have today was not as structured and you REALY had to mess up to end up people of Kachamak Bay took care of their problems themselves...and kept the crab populations happy.
A few years back they called a hault to all crabbing in the Kachamak Bay area...the crabs were gone. Many believe the population was wiped out due to over fishing, I know other wise.
At the time when crabs were in the Bay, fishermen everywhere tried different things to keep the crab happy and in the masses, these crabs were fed and treated like royalty...the monies brought in durring Crab Season were the way of life for the community by the sea. Some fishermen began making friends with the Crabs...talking to them about when the best times to fish are and where the largest Halibut could be found...this little dicussion was done privatly as to keep the secret fishing grounds secret.

Here my friends is the evidence...after a good meal of "undesirables" the crabs began to prefer that after dinner cigerette. (Note this one is smoking a menthol). This particular crab was smuggled into our camp site, he was questioned untill the answeres sought were recieved, allowed this last smoke, then turned into dinner to hide the evidance. So where did the crabs of Kachamak Bay go? Well those that managed to get away from this particular "fish terrorist" crawled their way over hills and swamps to return to the sea...some made it...some became birdy chow. The ones that returned to their friends below the waves returned with "man drugs." Peer pressure quickly past through the community of crabs, and fishermen every where began "losing" their cigerettes over the sides of their boats...with out the assistance of modern technology under the sea...the crabs all died of "gill cancer".

So this my friends and family is the true reason the crabs of Kachamak Bay have almost disappeared...dont take your cigerettes out on the water...I hear it's killing the smoked fish industry. my reality

Tuesday, March 28, 2006


Just thought I would tell ya all...
I am going to mow the lawn...

Monday, March 27, 2006

With that out of the way...

Monday...hope your weekends went as well as mine...having all the kids here for the whole weekend was a mad house...Crystal and I cleaned up at least three times a day and you would not be able to tell ten minutes later...We had a full weekend filled with laughter and love. Josh rearranged my snow to make a race track in the front yard and a snow fort in the back...the race track gave the neighbor lady many hours of laughter as she watched the older boys race first the remote snow machines then all the cars...Eric has enough of them that if you charge them up by the time your done killing all the batteries the first one has from snow machines to "mini" mico racers...the track was a success.....
the fort??? Well this adventure started out as a 'snow fort" for the babies to play turned into two snow walls and a war zone.....Snow balls the weapon of choice....Brittany and her friends against Josh and Donny....three hours of snow yard is almost bare....(this was actually and excuse to pass my snow off to my neighbors.) Since they sat and watched laughing at the continious snow cloud...they should not be too upset when my flowers are blooming and my lawn needs mowed while they are still under my snow......
So now I am guessing that any neighbors who saw the hord of kids here are getting worried....trying to find our exactly who bought the house....see we moved in and it snowed....I have never played in my back yard....Now it is well played in....and the neighbors broke in.....
The weekend drew to an end with little Buddy sick...the ear ache and cold kept him up all night...that explains why my post is late this am..........Melissa went with the big kids to Wasilla and Donny will be off to work hopes that Buddy will nap most of the day...I may get some chores done....but will probably reality

Points to Ponder

So to answer the question of why I would be up pondering eggs in the wee hours of the day....
because I can!
durring normal waking hours I spend my time teaching the kids to pick their noses and throw the buggers at the windows.....we play "trash the house" and empty the fridge.....we also have a jolly fun time floating anything in the all should realy try that some time...I recall Heath loves chasing golf balls out of the john.
Then there is the needs taken out every is on strike and will not clean it's box...the laundry well it's in the laundy room so I can forget it too needs my attention....we wont get to the money that needs spent and the dog poop that needs bagged for the garbage man....
so in the wee hours of the morning when the family is all asleep they dont much care for me vacuming and slamming cupboards in the dish washing instead of cleaning I blog............"Susie Cynthia Sally Stout...please wont you take the garbage out."

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Sex Talk

What came first....the chicken or the egg?? Now seems like an irrelevant question in todays society...with wars for freedom being fought all over the world...
this question is still one of the most asked questions on Sesame Street...
If I go to the grocery store the chicken comes breakfast...the egg.
I can go through the grocery store backwards...
then the egg would come first.
In the papers the "chicken" comes first...and with it...the birdy flu...
does the flu effect the egg?
My next it realy worth the extra 2.50 to buy those eggs in the store that are laid by "free chickens"? The eggs packaging suggests that "free" bird eggs are hormone free...steroid free...stimulant free...and cage free...
homone free birds must have complex problems over their lack of want, to produce eggs...
without steroids who's eggs are larger???
No stimulants? that could be why the eggs are more expensive...the birds fall asleep on the job without their coffee beans....
and lets talk cage free...
Here we have all these animal rights activists shrieking about "slavery of animals" humane breeding purposes...and what ever other ban wagon they can ride....have they ever considered that they themselves probably live in a cage too..
okay so box housing is not exactly a cage...but close enough if the neighbor has rude house guests that park so you cant leave.
Nor have they considerd that a "cage free chicken" will eat anthing in it's can they garentee me that this chicken has not eaten his fair share of coffee beans....and birth control pills? So the age old question has not been answered but another has been born from the research....Do chickens in "slavery" produce eggs of poorer quality than "free" chickens?
my reality

Saturday, March 25, 2006


Summer Equinox....I have decided Josh and Crystal are going to finally tie the may require a shot gun or two to get the Bride up the aisle....but the groom is all for it....since the bride is currently sitting on my left and has not stopped this announcement....WEDDING N JULY!!!!!!

Friday, March 24, 2006

My First Bra

Now that I am thinking about it it seems like yesterday....two small girls were ducking behind the cars in the car ports...working their way to Brenda's house...they were giggling and trying hard not to be seen by anyone as they continued their journey...eyes learing from across the street...watching them make their path..noting that these young girls had rather large breasts for the average seven year old. Thoughts of cruel and unusual punishments ran through the mans head untill they settled on the best possible plan of actions...his motto was prior planning prevents piss poor preformance pregnancy and prison (I added the last two hehe). He wanted this to go as his demented mind spent all week waiting for friday night...
Bouncing into the house...back packs, coats and boots flying all's Friday and the girls were having a sleep over...giggling they made their way to her room to spend the afternoon playing. Dinner was called and brought the girls back to reality..
Joining the rest of the family at the table the two girls were obvliviouse to the chaos of the two older boys, (one of which the little girl was planning to marry), nor the complaints about the meal offered coming from the small girl across the table...a baby was throwing food around on his chair...this is how dinner proceded....after the meal was served...the girls father asked the family to remain at the table...he had a gift for his oldest daughter....removing from his lap a beautiful wrapped package complete with bow he handed it to his oldest daughter...just because I Love You...the girl smiled and took the gift...she opened it there at the table .....a bra...a "training bra"...."to help you train them." he said.......

father I have saved that bra...yes for a very long time...see some day I was planning on using it against you...maybe in an abuse case appears that with out knowing it my cousins have taken care of this little episode for I hope at the time you are planning your next perverted bra will remember I have once been targeted by you with a instead of bing embarrassed or humiliated in front of the man I was going to marry....(you ruined the union between me a Stephan)....oh a young girls may just see the man I am married to, dancing in the fire pit one warm summer night clad in nothing but your bras...holding his bottle of Yager. my reality

and now a brief message...

Well springis here...even if it snows...spring is here...or if it is not someone better tell the bear that roamed our neighborhood yesterday....funny all my childhood here I did not see a three years I have seen several and two in Anchorage City Limits....guess they like the city life...
Coming home I noticed tracks from the mail box over the twenty foot snow berm and across my yard...found it kind of funny that my husband waded through the yard instead of using the plowed drive....when I walked up to the porch the cat was there and he was not a happy kitty....his fur was standing on end...I looked around and did not see the moose I expected instead I noticed the tracks were not human...the excretement definatly was not human...the consistancy of the mess told me it was very new and somewhere in the vacinity was a bear...I unlocked the house and got the kids inside...the cat beat us in...looking out the windows upstairs I could see the path he made as he made his way through the neigborhood looking for small morsals to tide his hunger till fishing season....They warn us not to put garbage out...but this bear was not interested in the garbage cans linning the street...he had checked a few out and must have found them offensive. Guess he wants cat. I followed his marks through yards...onto the street and through more yards...from his marks he did not stick around anywhere for the end of the snow trail I saw....a fairly large brown hairy rump rounding the corner from Ambergate to Cambell Air Strip....he was just taking his time...enjoying the spring......

Thursday, March 23, 2006


My house is a mess,
my children screaming,
phone wont shut up,
and the dog it keeps peeing....
Did get a shower,
have not brushed my hair,
my daughter wont even allow me downstairs.
My husbands not home,
the older kids either...
they all have deserted me...
like I have the fever.
leaving me here with two little beasts,
that make great big messes,
loud whines and screams,
then throw them selves at me,
for hugs not a beating.
hugs turn to pinches,
tiny toes in the gut...
a slobbery kiss, hey pucker up...
As I sit on the floor being assulted as such,
my mind it does wander to much calmer stuff.
a trip to the beach, fresh air and warmth,
the wind blowing my hair...
HEY DAMN THEY HAVE GUM!!!! reality.....

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Politically Correct Nursery Rhymes

Sooo as I "dissed" on our government and their stupid studies...England tops us for "stupidness". they are claiming that Mother the reason prejudice is so rampant in society...seems to me the government is making issues from nothing...So in England they have changed Humpty Dumpty so he has a happy ending..."Humpty Dumpty opened his eyes, falling down was such a surprise, Humpty Dumpty counted to ten, then Humpty Dumpty got up again" Okay so the egg does not get scrambled and all the kings men will starve...but Humpty is not a sacrificial figure now. "Save the EGG."......Now this is not all...Mother Goose's work is being tarnished and manipulated also in "Baa Baa Black Sheep" Seems the old meaning of this poem is no longer considered..(so much for history) this poem was originally written in the early 1700's when political views were easily stated through writing and poetry...with out getting in trouble with the King...Seems the wool refered too in this poes...realy meant wool was taxed less than white wool and the monies made were split between the "master" (property owner), the church (the dame) and the little boy (the farmer) by mutating this poem they are ignoring history and killing the great works of Mother Goose...the new poem will read...Baa Baa rainbow sheep....have you any wool....yes, yes three bags full....then it will proceed through the color spetrum allowing each person to add their own I gueess purple sheep would be taxed less???
With the great works of even greater artists being mutated and modified...will we see a change in Romeo and Juliet too...our suicide rates are climbing in our teen agers...could be the story of two love struck souls who die in each others arms rather than live life apart...lets not even talk about what Social Services will do to The old Woman Who lived in a reality

It's All About MEEEE

Good Morning everyone...the sky looks blue and the sun will be up...could it be today is the day we see the edges of the lawn??? Okay so I am pusshingit a little but a few days of fifty and we could be well rid of this years "snirt". (this is my new word of the describes all that shit they plowed into giant black piles yesterday) and they left well enough alone the "chunkeys" would have slowed traffic down...instead they plow down to pavement and the water frezzes...causing all the "accidents" they are reporting....hellooooooo....I dont get it....when will man figure out that some times we should leave mother nature alone...she has a way of cleaning up the topic today is ICE!!!

Yes the government is studying why ice is slippery...they are looking for ways to decrease injuries due to ice related falls and accidents....why does this make me yesterday the paper had a bleep to add to this...they are studying penguines...not for the penguines bennys but for ours...the government feels if they can find out WHY a penguine does not fall while shuffleing its way around life...maybe they can prevent more elderly from falls...and since penguinse walk on ice...the government is backing this study as a part of the slippery ice one.... should be interesting to see what new advice they offer us next fall about slippery ice and shuffle walking...........

So I can think of any number of "interesting" things to study...Heidi could fill out all the grant money paper could bull shit through the letters to get the money....then we could "study" on the governments dime....maybe...we could study the why dust flies and how to prevent it this memorial weekend...or maybe why is rain wet????

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

It did not freeze last night.

It's called spring fever...a very highly contagious disease of the's making it's rounds faster than the flu...with more power than superman...surging through the blood stream tickling all the senses and making every one BITCHY!!!! Well everyone at my house anyway...sent the kids out yesterday hoping a romp in the snow would cure them for awhile...that lasted untill their little feet hit the snow...they sunk!!!straight down...I pulled them to their feet to discover that they were soaked!!! That means under all this new fallen snow spring is pulling through...a layer of snow on top of a foot of slush...on top of MUD!!! Mud is a proven sign of spring...Mud means that it is almost planting season...mud...a mess for my home but a song for my soul...Dont get me wrong I would rather live in Alaska and deal with the snow than in Washington and deal with the rain...believe it or not it is warmer here...or at least feels like it most of the time. I do howerver know that by this time in Washington the daffodils are blooming and the tulips are sprouting their little green selves from their winter slumber....We still have a few weeks befroe the flowers arrive but under my window I have mud...and now I am listening for the rain...

Saturday, March 18, 2006

A Chance To Learn About Each Other

A cancer room I once belonged to had a board for of the games was a question and answer game...the purpose of this game for me is for us to get to know each other better...we have spent years biologically related but it's obvious by dads trivia game we may not know each other as well as we here goes.....

1. When you were a very small child...what was the first thing you "wanted to be when you grew up?"

Welcome Family

Soon I will be helping Eric and Donny build a blog is kind of odd that the family has moved "cyber". Oh well anyway we communicate works I guess...I am anxiously awaiting Erica and Heaths site...I have trouble navigating it..."dinker" will help fix it. So to all I love you and am so glad we are taking this time to get to know each other and communicat in ways we dont normally.
"THE FAMILY THAT BLOGS TOGETHER!" Hey where's mom?????in the tub with her wine, while it's quiet I am sure.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

My Olympic Experience

To begin with a balloon twister, contrary to popular belief, does not use helium in balloons being twisted. My flag did not fly on it's own all flags it required a dislaying device...that was so kindly provided by Central Shop. This 15 minute contribution to my project landed Central a couple of contracts with the Alaska Hockey Association. Thanks to DeeDee Jonrow making it into Nome...all media coverage was converted to "live from Nome."

Moving on to the party...a balloon twister should NOT show up at any event before the speeches are delivered...children see that belt and all else except maybe Santa losses their interest. I am surrounded by little people when the DJ begins the party...try telling the children that adults talk too I quietly tried to twist for them while the audience applauded...but her darn Math teacher just went on and on and on....even the kids realized he was saying the same thing over and over again...I believe teachers are trained for this....

Finally after quite a long time Pam Dryer was allowed the podium...she is a petit thing...not what one would expect from a Hockey Chick...and she was human...not what anyone there somehow she morphed into an Olympic God or something...she recounted her experience going to a foreign country...apparently our apparell over here is considered unappropriate over there...the first thing they had to do was go shopping at a store set up by the Olympic Committee that contained only appropriate clothes...she mentioned that the "city" was built for their lodging purposes...all the countries had their own buildings... appartment style with three to four per room...All the buildings...except our Great Nations...had the countries flag hanging from the side of the building...she mentioned that Canada has an "ego problem" as their flag was the size of the entire wall...and the USA...we did not hang our flag...why? she was asked...She did not have the answer for this question...So tell we think not hanging our flag will protect the Olympians from a terrorist attack...dont think It would be to hard to figure out that all the countries but us had their flags hanging...and everyone knew we were there...or was this because we HAD to be different so the other countries new we have a BIG EGO. Either way it seems we were rather silly not flying our flag off our building. So she went on to say that being there was probably similar to being in jail...they were not allowed to "just hang" with friends and family untill their events were completed...this is to prevent drugs from being passed after the initial drug tests.
I think the best story was the one she told about Barbra Bush and her antrage of secret service agents..we were playing Finland...Barbra had finished a "pep" talk just prior to the game..."people who dont know hockey should not pretend they do." as quoted by Pam apparently Barbra was making her rounds around the arena...never once sitting and watching the game....when one of our girls who was not strong on making goals...made a goal one of the secret service agents at the back quietly raised his fist into the air "whooped it around" and dropped it again to his side returning to the proper stance. Pam mentioned, even though this cheer was done silently, it was the loudest one in the arena.
So after all the speeches were done and Pam was siging the endless autographs the media moved in on my flag and me twisting. they spent about ten minutes getting footage from different angles of me and the flag. I had a good time...the kids were realy got into it and may be future competion...I blame all pop ages on my reality

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Big is Better Right??

Not a long blog today got a huge flag to twist...started out my day yesterday blowing up balloons for it. I am twisting at the coming home party for the USA womens hockey team goalie in Eagle River...for those that dont follow hockey they took the bronz. So my flag started out to be big...i was figuring 6 x 5 maybe...well...I have never been much good with "sizing" so now my flag is going to be more like 12 x 10. okay so it doubled in is turning out very well....Anna and I even figured out how to make "ol' Glory" wave like shes blowing in the will be awsome...problem now do I get it to Eagle River????

Monday, March 13, 2006

What goes up MUST come down!!!

Woke up yesterday morning in a grumpy mood. Seems life deals us many shitty cards we have to decide whether to hold or discard...Josh and Crystal have been having issues for awhile with her place of employment. It is a family run business quite similar to what she grew up with. This story is not about her job, or lack there of, I will post that later when I figure out how to put it together in the right way...surfice to say she was WRONGFULLY terminated. When her and Josh went in to get her stuff, the owners daughter began screaming at them....when Josh told her to calm down they just want Crystals stuff..."the wage and loabor commisioner will deal with the rest" She punched him in the boy walked away...(damn surprise to me) I spent time on the phone calming them both and helping them figure out a reasonable way to deal with it all.
We decided a sledding trip up Hatchers Pass was in need for all of our mental health.
Grumpy or not I packed the snow gear, picnic lunch stuff and the children...we pulled out of town fourty minutes later than planned, forgot the sleds and had to return to the house...
It was worth it...the trip up there is absolutly BEAUTIFUL...I am talking ROCKY MOUNTAIN HIGH beautiful...Reminded me of many road trips from Durango to Montrose...we will have to go camp there some time...anyway at the top we unloaded the snow machine and the kids...everyone had a blast...the babies played on the lower hills and the bigger children raced an eight hundred pound machine up the side of a mountain at speeds I could not imagine...the coming down part would give me a heart attack.
Josh and Eric took turns "High Marking" the slope....Josh's machine was the envey of all up there...(of course, my husband bought it.) I knew that machine had power...but I never imagined it could climb straight up, at least half a mile, at fifty.
Last run of the day...Eric reliquished the machine grudgingly admitting he was exhausted from four hours of climbing.....Josh jumped on for one more run at beating Erics highest mark....

Standing in the parking lot we watched him ascend that mountain...half way up he seemed to slow, not a good decision if you are trying to get top mark, we watched as he continued to climb another 500 feet or so then just stopped. This to is not a good move when your going straight up...we watched as he struggled with the machine, he was up on that steep slope...he managed to get the maching into a horizontal position and we watched as he popped the couling opened....we watched for about fifteen minutes...several other machines went up to see if he needed help, but were unable to stop at the point he was without risking themselves too...the parking lot filled as the back country skiers and machiners returned from their rides...Donny quit camcording as nothing was happening...then we saw him turn the sled down the mountain and get on it...relief flooded us just as the machine flipped nose over tail three times and Josh went flying...he appeared stuck on the machine as it slid down the mountain...after about 100 feet I saw his body disconnect from the machine...the machine kept coming...and hit a jump...sailed through the air and rolled again several times...righting itself...facing down still it continued to sled down that mountain...Eric, Donny, and Crystal ran for the bottom of the mountain to make sure all were out of the way....I ran to another machine and asked them to go up and make sure he was not hurt or dead.....And we watched....the machine "hauled ass" down that mountain without anyone to man the breaks...the engine was it was silent...I watched as the other machine went up...saw Josh stand up and wave then throw his helmet, wich proceded to come down the mountain as fast as the machine did. I knew then he was okay and figured the slide down would cool his temper...the machine arrived at the bottom without killing anyone...bashed up quite a bit but it ran the rest of the way off the mountain under its own power....with Josh at the controls. We loaded up and returned to Wasilla...all in one piece...upon arriving at Josh's we sat and debriefed till I felt every one was okay with the emotions we had just all had to deal with...we examined his helmet and discovered that the machine had either ran his head over or hit him numerous times. He will need to replace his helmet before he rides again...along with a ski...handle bars...and well lets just say...he has his work cut out for him if he wants to ride anywhere other than the trailes next winter.....So I once again thank the heavens for sitting at that kids side...he has to be related to a cat. The reason behind this horrible scene was a drive broke on the way up...he tried to repair it up there, but could not support the machine and pull the clutch plates at the angle he he attempted to ride it power less down to a leveler spot...anyone up for a bobsled ride straight down a mountain on an eight-hundred pound sled? Neither was he...the first time it flipped he was thrown but hung on in hopes to stop or at least slow the machines descent...he quickly realized that his 140 pounds was NOT going to do him any good so he let go to prevent killing himself....then sat and cried while he watched his most prized material possesion descend the mountain without him...missing the ride of his life. The helmet went when the tears turned to anger...although this required him so "sled" to another spot to retrieve it before finishing his descent down to his sled...I was stuck with babies in the Blazer when he reached the sled itself...Crystal said she cried at the look on his face and had to return to the Blazer...later Josh told us that look was a look of AWWW...he expected MUCH MUCH worse...he was ecstatic that it started up and rode under its own power back to the truck....returning home he asked if I would baby sit..a message for Crystal on the machine promised her a job Managing the local Arbys starting Tuesday....and Josh well he needs parts see good things do come from negative ones........ my reality

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Wanna Go To Vegas

Rock, Paper, Scissors??? Well hell if adult games are illegatl why not?? Walking through the mall, I noticed the petioners are out gathering signitures for future possible laws...I signed all three...the first one was an initiative that will ban all air hunting...this seems fair to me...if the hunted can not fly by its own means then the hunter should not be able to either...fair is fair... if bird hunters want to fly around in their planes and take out their prey...well that seems a little silly but a little more fair then being able to spot your prey form the air, land on top of it and smash it dont you think???
The second one had something to do with monies for schools and such...and the third was a petion to the state for a state lottery or power ball type game...funny how we dont allow "gambling" but we have several of the largest "lotto" style games in our state...The Nenana Ice Classics have been going for years...cant say this is not a gamble...then theres BINGO, texsas Hold'em tournaments, and pull tabs all over town...a "rock paper scissors" tournament, to say nothing of the Fishing Derbys all over the state...So all in all I do not see how a lotto style game will harm our state...nor do I feel casinos that offered slot's would damage us...seems providing something for people to do, that did not charge an exuberant cover charge to listen to a crowd of people attempt to hear an amature band; that may or may not resemble music, would lower our population of people who have nothing to do but cause trouble. After reading todays paper they can no longer use the excuse that "gambling promotes crime and prostitution" seems to me Alaska has had an abundance of both for quite a long time...Maybe gambling would give the "johns" (sorry bro) and "druggies" something else to spend their time and money on..."If you cant beat them Join them." Britts got 659 nickels saved up for me when the time comes I will be first in line for the nickel reality

Saturday, March 11, 2006


Well poop...I just knew things were moving too smoothly...Dont get me wrong, I am not ungratefull for what I have, just pissed off that what I want is now put on hold. after quite a few appointments to get my teeth fixed and my partials made....the lady in book keeping called YESTERDAY. She said in the beginning she was "getting pre-approval" from my insurance company...she informed me then that my finacial obligation after insurance paid theirs would be about 1800 dollars. Okay I thought, I can do that, it will be tight but IF I am ever going to quit smoking and put on weight it would be nice if I could at least eat....the inch and a half gap in the whole back of my mouth makes it almost impossible to chew anything with any real substance. I had most of my molars pulled...they were all in need of 3000 dollars worth of work....times that by 16!!!!!!!! So over the last few years I have had them pulled as they broke and caused insurance, and I sure as hell can not afford their rates to fix for 250 I had them pulled....So now the frame work is done the teeth themselves should be with in a week. Yesterday I recieved a message on my answering machine...."Spoken to the insurance part is $3760. Your insurance company has a thousand dollar max." Funny should she not have known this in the beginning...but more so "A THOUSAND DOLLARS!!" Do you know how fast a grand will go in one of those dentists chairs....I have had chemo specialists that charge less then the damn dentist in our country.....I learned the teeth are our first line of defense as well as the beginning of proper and good nutritional habbits....why are they not mandated like docs are? Who would I write too to complain about this....Bush seems too damn busy over seas to pay much attention to what is going on in his own country....Seems my local government could not do much as it is a national issue.....Maybe the American Dental Association needs a "hate letter" as Brittany so lovingly called my last political adventure....Maybe I will send a similar one to the American Medical Association...they are huge although I feel they probably will not want any changes in the dental area...bad teeth means poor health and more patients visiting docs and hospitals. Maybe the insurance companys is where I should start....So in the mean time...please drive by the corner of Northern Lights and Minnisota...the new sign holder could use your spare change for her new teeth that will now be sitting three blocks from my mouth untill I can pay them off.................................

Friday, March 10, 2006

good morning to you

Well another wintery day is born....damn I cant wait till spring...
So I see anonumous has returned...why do I feel like the center of some kirky joke my father and sister have set up...well if you are trying to scare me it wont work...see with the exception of my father who spent time over seas durring trial and strife...I have seen alot...not much scares me anymore. The psychotic man that walked into my apartment in Washington and preceded to pee all over my bathroom...that scarred me...the gun fight out side of the hospitol I worked at...that scarred son going through 8 hours of intensive urinary tract reconstruction...that too scarred me. An anonymous blogger that is more than likely my father or sister does not scare me. In fact it interests me...psychosis exhibits many symtome....I am thinking that anonymouse must have a perverse psychological need to try to antagonize a coward. As for not seeing me at the water park...well probably because I spent the first two hours trapped in an inner tube floating the lazey river with 37 pounds of crying baby in my lap...I spent the second two hours in the truck with the same child trying to get him to nap...So I did not have much fun...regrett not being able to spend any time with Lou...and watch her play with Heidi...lets just say I will chose to forget this one and maybe sone day will return to the park without an anchor pinching my boobs black and blue....yes I have hand prints all the way around my front and half way around the back...HE DID NOT LIKE THE WATER anonymous next time look a little hareder...I would have gladly handed him off to someone for awhile, he too was in blue.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006


The warmth on my face slowly drew me from the cozey cacoon I had created for myself. Song birds singing in the trees outside my window and a small breeze tickled my mind from a world that seemed far away. A law mower began singing its song somewhere off in the distance. My mind, floating somewhere between two worlds, absorbs the sounds of life.
My cacoon expands as I am filled with the music of living.
Light begins to penatrate the space I have created between oblivion and eternity as the sun continues on it's circular path through body rests...
ow...the warmth? the cat sitting on my chest with her head resting on my birds???try Britts friends having a snow ball fight in the street...I dont want to even think what the small breeze could have mower??? try snow crunchers and dump 6:30 in the morning...the light???you guessd it the kid who was trying to find her jacket and Noe's Ipod. so the music of life has long till bed time????

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

One More Sappy Post of Thanks

This post is dedicated to my Gradparents....
My Grandparents that have left human form,
and to my Grandparents still struggling with it.

Grandma Harrington is and always has been my role model.
A woman who worked hard for her family and even though few saw it...
a small child did...she derived her happiness through her children...
seeing them enjoy each other...
I have always wanted that sense of family she worked hard to obtain.
Over the years as I have struggled with life...I have always been able to turn to her.
First through written corrospondances,
Now through a wierd spiritual connection...I know she is with me...
I can finally make a biscut that is edible and gravey that is not lumpy...
she put alot of energy into this one....I know she will come to my aid and help me.
Thank You Grandma for helping me put my faith in family...
for helping me hold on to the hope that someday I too would be reunited with a child I lost.

Grandpa Harrington was the best horse a kid could have...
He showed me the gift of play
Grandpa always smiled in my memories....
I have heard many things about this man...
but in my eyes he will always be the best horse a kid could have.

Grandpa Epperson...thank you for teaching me to love my self.
It was nothing I can tell anyone else how to do....
loveing yourself comes from with in...
Loving yourself is knowing how to let go of the negative energy
let it move where it needs to go...release the one is perfect.
Release the anger...holding on just constipates the system...
Through the gift of meditation I have learned that to love myself I have to forgive myself.
For this gift I thank you....It has cleared my soul and allowed me to see the picture as a whole.

Grandma inspiration of strength. I have nevered gotten to know Grandma on a personal level...who she is where she came from...but this has taught me much...
it does not matter really...she is my grandma...she has worked hard in her life to satisfy her internal needs...she has dedicated her life to something she feels strongly about. something that gives her reason to get up in the morning...Grandma you have taught me self happiness...
Many things need done in life to least find something that will fullfill your internal needs while sending energy into society in a productive way.
Grandma has given the gift of music to many...a gift that makes everyone happy. through years of hard but I am sure satisfying work...her legacy will survive. The gift she has given many over the years is still topic of conversation with all who have come to know her over the years...
Through this gift of music Grandma gave me a friend...not just any friend but a friend that I have bonded with heart mind and soul. Grandma I thank you for this gift...I know that no matter where I am or what I am doing Tomi Leigh (Thumper) has been a gift of faith hope and light in my life...

So thank You to my Grandparents...they helped make me who I am. my reality.


FINALLY....Seems like I have waited forever to have my family. Now we are all here. I have cried more tears in the last two days than I think I ever have in my life. Seems my eyes just keep leaking and my heart keeps swelling....The pecking order of things has changed...At first sightof their brother Josh and Brittany realized that "picking on Donny" may have some detrimental side effects now... He is no longer that "little wimp" they had so much fun torturing. He is over six feet tall most of it being leg...his personality has not changed as much as one would think after what he has went through. He is still the loving, ready to please, little boy(with a mature man waiting on the edge to surface) hiding in that HUGE adult body. It is so weird looking at the three older children then the two younger ones...hard to believe they were all Rileys size at one time....okay maybe not Donny who was born BIG. Watching my children all together (my grand children too) I have discovered true happiness. Seeing your children love each other and bond for the common good of the family is an amazing feeling and truthfully one I thought would NEVER happen (all those fights make you think they realy do hate each other). So the competion for mom has added one more and has motivated to a new level of maturity....okay maybe not but I can hope right? It was amazing how Josh let himself actually relax. He too seemed. for the first time since we moved back home, to finally feel complete and happy. Having Donny come back to us has allowed us to move the past back and repair some old wounds. It took the boys awhile to get comfortable again...about 16 hours till the first wrestling match was on....yes Josh won BUT he is the one wearing all the rug burns and bruises...not Donny this time. Seems even though he is a lover not a fighter (he does not like the pain that goes along with a wrestling match) he is bigger and more determined than ever to NOT be the one picked on. They have grown beyond that stage but it was one of the concerns he and I had...maturity has changed the way they interact and maturity has brought them all together and made them realize that in this world they have only one constant....thats mom. They have all finally realized what I have been after for years...MOM is not the bad guy. My name has been drug through the mud, stomped on by the dogs and thrown out with the trash. Jeff has always made me look bad in their eyes...he tried hard to win their love through dominance, anger and control....a life filled with endless promises that were never kept. I (and they will all admitt it now) tried to never talk bad about Jeff when the boys were at my home. I promised nothing but my love and support. I had no monies to buy their love and told them then that some day they would understand. I cried many tears over those years as the boys found Jeffs money provided many more vacations and such than mine ever could....they grew into adolescents and their lives revolved around "what can I get out of it?". Now as young adults, even though my physical influence in their lives was minimal, they all have finally realized that through it matter how bad they tried to hurt my feellings and make themselves feel love for them grew there was NOTHING that they could have done that would have turned me against patients and pain is being rewarded now...MY KIDS HUGGED with out having to be beet first. they are truley happy to be a family again and for one day they were kids again, not the kids from the past with lots of questions and no trust, but the kids they should have got to be. (Boy am I glad now I had them in two heeps.) You should have seen the waitress at Dennys face when I trooped in with eight kids. Okay Crystal was having to play the adult role too...we were out numbered. LOL. buddy called a screeching hault to our day and an evacuation of the resteraunt when he had to poo.....head to toe poo.....oooz out the pants leg poo...paint moms cloths poo.....I could have died of embarrassment and of course the kids paid the bill and ran before anyone knew they were with me. DENNYS STUNK!!! a poo trail on the floor from our table to the bathroom. Melissa would not even pee in the bathroom it was so bad. I did clean the bathroom as best I could with wet wipes and water (damn blow dryers do NOT clean up poo well.) I tied the trash bag closed and did replace it with the one they leave in the bottom of the can...and the kids left an extra ten bucks with the tip. LOL....dont know who cleaned the floors outside the rest room, I did appologize and made a hasity retreat for home to change the shirt and pants that I had to hand wash in DENNYS bathroom the blow dryers did come in handy. my reality

Sunday, March 05, 2006


Hey eveey one lets convoy down E street, the slush puddles should be ripe. I read that the collection agencies are camping out...yes that was CAMPING outside the PFD office. They are awaiting April 3 when they will be allowed to garnish your divedend. I understand the need to be paid...but if I were in that job line...I do not think camping out on the streets of Alaska's biggest city AND advertising that your not homeless but sitting there waiting to take their dividends........well seems to me like you would be a sitting Duck.


Happy Birthday Elizabeth...Ms. Twists number 1 fan. So today her Daddy is taking us all to H2Oasis. Not quite the Hawian trip he took her on but I guess he could not get bookings on the plane for us all...funny since her Grandaddy flies the thing. Guess Alaska Airlines does not allow the piolets to "borrow the planes" sucks for us. So we will settle for a trip to the water park. That brings just one problem...even when the weather was 100 in Washington I DO NOT wear a bathing suite. No I do not go naked either although some of you would get quiet a thrill from that, most would run in fright. Shorts and a tank top yes but I do NOT like my girl parts hanging out...why is it mens suites cover all the good stuff and womens shove it out?? So Jon must have suspected I would use this excuse and he must have known I was not a swimmer nor do I own a suite...he bought me one and dropped it off last out went that rational for not swimming. Last year little "Lizzy" (she will kick hard if she hears you call her this) took us all to Chuck-E-Cheeses. I was "hirred" to twist and the kids and Eric were invited to play...Not much twisting got done when there was lots of "coins" waiting for video games and rides. This year I am a guest not "hirred help" I am thinking that Jon being the only single man in our groupe needs a date for this little swimming I will bring his date...last year it was a GIANT Penguine.....this year...well its a water park so the naked lady is out...but IF her suite just happens to be shoving her parts out...
So a mini vacation this home for naps this afternoon...that only leaves about 9 hours to blow before I will hold my son in my arms again...this is going to be an interesting night...Josh, Brittany and I will pick him up. I would like a few moments of our time to have my "old family" in my clutches...a chance to put that part of our lives behind us and begin our moves for a good future. Thing will be so different...he is a man now...we all still see that 12 year old that he was when he was here last...when I saw him two years ago he was over six feet tall and his feet well lets just say I knew those feet were HUGE, could not ever find shoes to fit that boy. We will have to establish a whole new way of things...I am his mother...he needs the guidance but he is an adult man now...looking at him and knowing I could do nothing to help him over the last 18 years makes me sad...guilty...and angry...all emotions I will have to deal with and move on from...we will make it five years we will be the family we envision when we dream of the future together.
Well I made a "pop" trip to Wasilla yesterday...Sara's house is beautifull....funny it is decorated PERFECT for me. I was so calm and comfortable there...seems the home is good for her family too...they were calmer than I have ever seen them when they were not asleep. No major fights or disagreements and they with mine actually left us alone to visit...I enjoyed it Sarah thanks.
After leaving her home I decided to "pop" in on the kids. I read in Ann Landers that a parent should call adult children before just showing up. Hmmmm....why??? so I put my manners aside, almost (I called when I pulled onto his road). He was outside and heard me coming. How the hell did he pick the sound of my Blazer up over the Ford Deisel I was following...I know someone told him I was coming...but he did not tell Crystal who was showering and came running down stairs for her clothes in the buff....LOL I helped birth both my Grand babies I have seen it all but you would have thought someone important was there with the way she shrieked and went running up the stairs. Yes the house was a mess, sink full of dishes, babies filthy and a living room floor covered in baby toys and "cookies". See I raised him well...(should have raised his allowance...or given him one for that matter) I will make it up to him...Heidi want to get rid of one of your "rats" ? He needs a "dust buster."
Being the nosey mother that I am...I read his was sitting open on the table and well...I am a mother ya son's unemployment runs out next month...he is looking for work...he had a letter there from Northwest Dynasty, Pogo Mine. He has an interview for next week...IF he gets hired and the letter sounded very positive...he will be leaving by april 1. He is applying as a Heavy Equipment Operator...and it looks like they might just hire him as one...guess they are desperate for employees he is just now 20 and finally old enough to be covered by OSHA when he operates. So he went to school at 18 and had to wait till 20 to get work...stupid state paid for the school in the "JOBS" program with out looking at the age factor. So hopefully now the education will begin paying off.
Okay I am babbling...I will close here for the day and go read my paper....see ya at the water park.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

So its finally Saturday...I want to say I HAD A SHITTY FRIDAY! Take that in literal terms. My poor Buddy had a major stomach thing going on...22 diapers in 24 hours, four bedding changes, six carpet shampoos, and four cloths changes for mom. (left him in a tee shirt and diaper) He must have been feeling better by bed time because he consumed as much dinner as his father...running on empty makes my men real cranky. Off to bed he went at 9. Lou followed shortly after without much of a 9:30 and the house is quiet for the rings...Britt...why cant I ever remember that poor girl cant walk the four blocks home from her Friday Night outings. Once again I forgot to pick her up at McDonalds at 9:30...thats okay though she was not ready to come home till she called at 10:15. So I push my button and hear the comforting noise of my Blazer starting up. I retrieved my sweats and shoes and walked the blazer was cold...oh ya just cuz I can start it from inside does not mean it warms up in three minutes....hehehe....Returning home all is still quiet...I slink off to bed and found Lou had stayed in her I can actually sleep in my own bed...dream land came quick...then.....whats that noise...oh my GOD....the dog...making the most horrible ralphing noises I have ever heard....I awoke fast and moved even faster....nothing on the floor yet....out the door she went...Britt let her back in ten minutes later and the noise immediatly started again...the dog has to sleep in my room to and there was NO way I was going to deal with out she went again...four times we sent her out and four times she returned making noises...then I noticed the bloating in her when the ralphing is over the other end is gonna spew...Guess the dog has the flu too...I threw her out at 3:30. I tossed and turned all night afraid I would find her frozen in the morning. Day light came and I found a very happy, non-bloated dog roaming the back yard. I had to go out front and open the gate to let her through the front door...she refused to come up the steps to the porch....both are covered in half frozen, dog reality

Friday, March 03, 2006

Well It is Friday....This week has just drug by. I have not read my paper today...the headlines pissed me off....the Marshalls state the mother of the child shot in Homer warrned them her boy friend was violent...the article sounds like he fired the first shot...needless to say... durring the return gun fire a toddler was hit...the bullet went through the back of his head and out his eye. This is not the best thought to start the day off with. I am appalled. I was not there and do not know the circumstances but I do know that a toddler in the car the officers should have backed off. Maybe followed him home and got him at night in bed. the dude must sleep sometime. So now laying in a trauma bed on the pediatric intensive care ward is a young man who IF he survives will be blind, his eye site was lost when his father was shot...sounds like a lot of demons for this young man to over come in his life. The Bible says "children will suffer for their parents sins..." could this be the meaning of that verse???A life time of paying the consequences for his parents choices and actions.
This hits pretty close to home...Has anyone ever thought about the medical crew that recieved and is treating this young man? I have. I have been there. You know what it feels like when you have to return a child to a home you know is not safe? I do. When I read this I thought back to ALL the children I took care of. Most went home to safe enviroments, but Jamie she never left the hospital. Michael the 15 pound 2 year old...we saw him on a monthly basis...neglect but no way to prove it...he to never left the hospital after his 15th visit. Many others also come to mind...So I guess I just want to say...things like this affect many more people, than just those that were involved in the actually crime. The mental pain a medical care giver goes through when they know they can only do so much is one of the most helpless feelings you could possibly imagine. so to all the little people out there that will be affected by similar events in their lives...I pray...I pray that the angels are watching them...holding them tight and letting them know that somewhere out there an abundance of love is coming from a stanger........................................ in my reality.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Hyperbole Prattle has struck again.....Alright father give it up....seems to me that your name posts well on my Blog (I dont accept annonymous people) but on Heidis you have absolutly NO posts...what am I the favorite now...have you quit talking to Heidi finally....No you are working on driving me crazy....I bet Heidi is in on it too.....
Hyperbole---extravagant exaggeration....check your funk and wagnel thesaurus and see that the synonym to this is "Bull Shit". My Websters is much more reliable.
Prattle---endless babble, childish gibberish,...seems to me that "endless bullshit" would also be a synonym for this word.
As for Astute---exhibiting combined shrewdness and perspicacity often to the point of being artful and crafty.....that is you all the way although in a perverse sort of way.
So thanks for entertaining me for the day, but the dissapointment is great...I was really hoping that Mr. Tony and I were having another of our battle of the minds...appears if he is out there still he is being a silent stalker....So father you got me...but...I am gonna tell mama on you. She hates it when you pick on me...LOL...While I occupy her time tattling, my sister will have the perfect opportunity to break in and get the much covetted Bra collection. HEHEHE watch you flag pole father dearest..."Introducing Stans newest line of trolling bait........I bet the largest one at the top of the pole will attract lots of lusty fisherman looking for "the BIG ONES"
in my rality


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Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Man I get out of bed early anxious to read my paper...I tend to skim over anything about was in in Middle East...or Terrorist Trials...Mudslides in the Phillapines...ya know the stuff that makes out world scary...okay maybe not as scarrey as the "Letters to the Editor" boy let me tell you...we have some very opinionated people in this State...People who should come forth and speak out for their beliefs...this would allow people like me to come back and debate the issue...maybe this should be a new for of colume for the paper...a debate section....So today I take offense to Nancey Cuddebacks (from Anchorage) letter...she calls our children fact she calls most of us Alaskans Parasites and Losers.......
For the past few weeks the letters to the Daily News regarding the Legislature's consideration of withholding Permanent Fund dividend checks until the recipient actually moves back to the state are amusing at best. (I think this is sarcasm) Here's a news flash for those of you in the military. While I really appreciate the sacrifices you've made to this nation, if you hadn't been stationed in Alaska in the first place, you wouldn't qualify for the dividend. Not to mention the extra pay you already receive for living here in the first place, since Alaska is considered an overseas posting. I don't see what their problem is. If they actually come back, they'll have a nice chunk of change waiting for them. (I am not sure how to feel about this one...while here??? Come back??how bout just the ones from here???)
And for you college students, if you lived in any other state, other than Alaska, and went to an out-of-state school, you wouldn't be getting free money for being born in the state that you came from. If having to wait to collect your free money once you return is such a burden, then don't come back. (now that is one bitchy comment) We already have enough losers and parasites living here already (bad editing this word is used twice in this sentance), go inflict your problems on some other state.
(Nancy Cudeback from Anchorage, Letters to the Editor, Anchorage Daily News, March 3,2006)

I am offended that an Alaskan would feel this way about our children. Either she has none or has enough money to support them all while they are away at college. Seems IF my child chose to leave state for an education that the state does not provide she should still recieve that divedend...especially if there is immediate family still residing in the state. Seems that money would not only help her surrvive...but aid her in returning home is proven that most Alaskans leave the is also proven that the majority of those raised here also return...
But the divedend issue is not what buggs me...this woman made it sound like the state is full of parasitic lossers....who is she to judge like that??? Maybe she should leave.
So to all my parasitic losser friends and family I bid you a good for the bug spray.