IS NO ONE READING BLOGS NOW?

TODAYS NEWS Totally and pitifully politically biased. (that was a big word sentence to show my intelligence) Is it a wonder that our world is going to shit...politicians argue they "did nothing wrong" when evidence obviously points elsewhere. Screaming and whining in many articles about the "under dog" not paying what he owes to society, yet in the next allowing the corporate giants to continue to fight over a 20 year old battle. WTF! (I like that exclamation) How is it possible for them to complain about us? If I screw up...I confess to my kids I did...then I fix it. (sometimes it might take me a few tries but at least I try) I do this to set an example for my children. They tell me not to "let them argue". If I don't how the hell are they going to learn to "play with the big boys". (these money makers seem to be the ones that argued with mama till she finally gave in to shut them up.) So todays paper is not being linked because it pissed me off!! Not really but I am too lazy to deal with looking up all the articles I read...it was good reading if you feel debate-ish. Allowing the public to comment on articles read on the internet has provided me with lots of entertainment today. So on that note...gonna go catch a nap before the chill'ins awaken. Toodles to all...and have a nice day.

This Kid Plays By My Rules!

A Duke was hunting in the forest with his men-at-arms and servants when he came across a tree. Upon it, archery targets were painted and right in the middle of each was an arrow. “Who is this incredibly fine archer?” cried the duke. “I must find him!” After continuing through the forest for a few miles he came across a small boy carrying a bow and arrow. Eventually the boy admitted that it was he who shot the arrows plumb in the center of all the targets. “You didn’t just walk up to the targets and hammer the arrows into the middle, did you?” asked the duke worriedly. “No my lord. I shot them from a hundred paces. I swear it by all that I hold holy.” “That is truly astonishing,” said the duke. “I hereby admit you into my service.” The boy thanked him profusely. “But I must ask one favor in return,” the duke continued. “You must tell me how you came to be such an outstanding shot.” “Well,” said the boy, “first I fire the arrow at the tree… and then I paint the target around it.” Last year’s National Poetry Contest came down to two finalists. One was a Duke University Law School graduate from an upper crust family; well-bred, well-connected, and all that goes with it. The other finalist was a redneck from Southeast Alabama A&M. The rules of the contest required each finalist to compose a four-line poem in one minute or less, and the poem had to contain the word “Timbuktu”. The Duke graduate went first. About thirty seconds after the clock started he jumped up and recited the following poem: Slowly across the desert sand Trekked the dusty caravan. Men on camels, two by two Destination-Timbuktu. The audience went wild! How, they wondered, could the redneck top that?! The clock started again and the redneck sat in silent thought. Finally, in the last few seconds, he jumped and recited: Tim and me, a-huntin’ we went. Met three whores in a pop-up tent. They was three, we was two, So I bucked one and Timbuktu. A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Austin to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says, “I want my $20 million.” The man replied, “No, sir. It doesn’t work that way. We give you a million today and then you’ll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years.” The Redneck said, “Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it.” Again, the man explain that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 19 years. The Redneck, furious with the man, screams out, “Look, I want my money! If you’re not going to give me my $20 million right now, then I want my dollar back!” Thats it for the news today folks...another wards...the reporters had the weekend off...and the paper was BORRRRRRING!!!! Have a great Day......

Brew OPOLY

Pumpkin carving night at sisters house...many good faces were made...hopefully sister got pictures cuz I still do not have a digital camera...hehe...(I mean hint hint hint)...After pumpkins were carved and the mess cleaned up...dinner of chili and corn fritters with honey butter or apple butter...mm mm....cuppy cakes for dessert.....yummy (Heidi's candy stash did not survive either) Now the brew opoly game (someday we will play this with a version of all the beers represented on the board)...a version of the countries most popular board game...and the perfect game for John and Eric. A game where one buys beer breweries and builds pubs...many types of beer are available...but ... don't buy Wisconsin...no one likes it and NO one stops on it. (the only piece of property I owned as by the time my turn came I "rented" the first two thirds of the game.) Being a non property owner...I had the experience to try many types of beer...Moose Drool a favorite...but a little pub on the Columbia River was my favorite stop....owned by my sister of course...I am not sure who won this game as I began packing while Britt finished for me...but I do know a Monoply is illegal in the United States...and I feel that I should NOT have to own all two or three properties to build my damn pub in WISCONSIN!!!

Our day at a glance...

After running some errands yesterday...Heath and I decided to stop at Safeway for dessert. Leaving the kids in the car with Brittany, Heath and I began our trek into the store during "combat hour"...(the five o clock rush home with dinner hour)...Now certain people in our family have "small" pet peeves that can not go unnoticed by the rest of us. Walking past the front row handicapped parking we noticed a white BMW with a wheel chair in the back and a 200 year old lady in the front...(think I am exaggerating her age? Probably but you could barely see her little old head above the door window.) Well we could not leave this unnoticed thanks to Heidi's rants...and made the comment to each other..."Leave the handicap in the car and take advantage of the sticker..." or something along those lines...laughing it off we went about our shopping... Leaving the store...we noticed a black gentleman trying to coach the little ol lady into opening the door...we took in the picture and had to laugh...her groceries stored safely in the trunk...she had locked him out! He was attempting to direct her in rolling down the window...or unlocking the power lock...she wanted nothing to do with this. Pulling out of the parking lot I could not help but stop and ask him if he needed any help. Now he must have understood what it looked like for a BIG black guy to be trying to break into a little ol white ladies car...he smiled looked embarrassed and said sheepishly...."She locked me out." We had to laugh as we drove away. So as the year draws to an end it has been brought to my attention...by a fine upstanding Anchorage Police Officer...that my license is expired...hehe...almost made it 10 months without getting caught...I blame old age and forgetfulness...So today...I will take Mac for his puppy shots...and go through the torterouse adventure at the DMV...I just hope this time the lady actually speaks English!! The benifit here is I have a chauffer...after getting "caught" I just know they will be waiting to ask me "How did you get to the DMV?" So now my fine friends and family...the "nerd" has a blemish on her record...and I scored 2 points!!! Who's the loser now!! Muhahahahaha

What is happening to our judicial system?

It all started with this "Linehan's sister jailed". Funny how she came back as soon as closing arguments were done...good verdict I think...justice may be served here. Then moved on to this..."Man Charged with Second Degree Murder..." Now this is questionable. But murder?? A lot of unknowns here so I will not assume he was traveling at high rates of speed...just not paying attention. and then this...."Shooting Threats won't close Colony High." Now if this is not enough to make you go..."Damn they are not using their brains!!" or maybe they think "It wont happen to us." This may..."Hunt Continues for killing suspect." Now this man is sick and needs to be removed from our streets!! A danger to anyone that choses to drink with him. He needs to join the sickly insane...a cell next to Carl or Mechelle would be appropriate. and this one?? Well this is just plain wrong!! Penalized for saving a life in a possible confrontation that is one against many...and NOT shooting the gun?? oh read it and see how crazy our system is!! I just hope if this kid finds himself in a similar situation...he uses a BIG ROCK instead of the butt of a gun...less time to serve.

Mac Daddy!

My Mac "Daddy"... This little guy is good. (that little pink tongue is now black). During our trip south I decided it was a good time to work with this little guy without the distraction of the little ones. On a leash he walks as far as I will give him leeway. He does not tug or pull. Off the leash he stays with in three feet of me, usually in front of me he does not like me "breaking trail". He appears to be alert for noises but he never ran into the woods to investigate any of the birds, or squirrels we saw. 98% of the time he comes when he is called. The other 2% he likes to play..."Catch the Puppy"...never running off but staying just out of my reach. I have learned that if I lunge at him he thinks I am gonna get him...then I run and he bolts for me thinking I want him to catch me....I tackle him...snap on the leash and he gets grounded. He does not like being grounded and in fact when leashed he will "carry" his leash and walk next to me. Have had to spend very little time "educating" him. He is smart and catches on the first couple of times. Problem...he is afraid of the dark and will not go out the "doggy door" alone at night. This will change when he is no longer afraid of the BIG bull dogs next door. (I hope!) A little fellow eager to make me happy...I just hope this continues...it has been way too easy so far. Casualties of puppy....one phone charger, one lava lamp cord, one AC adapter, and a few chew marks on the piano, kids toys on the floor are free game...the kids figured it out quick...I no longer have hundreds of toys out at once. Trouble does not tolerate anything from him, Rug Rat is indifferent and almost seems to like teasing the puppy. Looking forward to having him next summer when I am out camping... Hope all are having a good day. Toodles.

Need a nickle?

Run Away

It all started with a teary conversation with my mother in law. She is lonely and needed my help with Jack going out of town. I spent a day and a half arguing with myself and finally decided that I have bitched for a long time about needing time, Crystal is not working and was available to watch the kids...and we all know Eric works long hours...so my dog and I headed south hoping it was not to cold to sleep in the camper or Yukon... lets just say staying at the in-laws and helping the in-laws is overload for any normal human. I packed my writing, a cooler of easy to use food, plenty of water for my dog, every sleeping bag and blanket in the house, that was not in use, made a bed in the back of my rig. Leaving behind kids and car seats is something very new to me...almost twenty two years and I have had one on my side unless I was in the hospital. Then I realized...the stereo is under my command...the dog dictates the stops...but no worries of disrupting happy or sleepy babies with a stop, the trip was good. I arrived in Homer and had dinner at Dugans with friends, enjoyed a visit with my brother then headed toward the HITW to sleep...only made it to the beach I love sleeping on the beach!!. Waking at 6 it was dark and I soon learned that in Anchor Point you can not find a cup of coffee before 9 am. I headed for Black Water Bend thinking of, "jo" and watching the sun come up from the top of Baycrest Hill...something I have not seen in twenty years. Guess what...they are closed for the season too...so off to Homer I went in search of the worlds best cup of coffee. KBay came into view just as I was beginning to curse small towns and their hours of business. You could smell the heavenly scent of fresh roasted java from half a mile away. An Americano from friendly staff I sat and contemplated my day...okay I sipped my coffee and read their "free" paper. Chris showed up for coffee and I took advantage of the free internet and his lap top to find mom and dad. Then off to the in-laws for what ever awaited me. Whats this...a puppy...okay a few minutes on the beach should not hurt anything...then a stop at my brothers to burn time till his doctor appointment...a trip up the new Sound View (I got lost the night before in the dark. Yes quit laughing...I got lost in Homer Alaska!)...then off to the in-laws...but wait...why is Homer Electric holding the electrical wires up on Bartlet Street...a house...moving up the street...had to sit and watch...okay I could stall no more...pulling into the driveway I let Mac out he instantly made friends with Wanda and Jack...I think they were hinting they wanted my dog. So their needs?...Wanda needed help cleaning her closet and they have some 400 pound wall units they want moved to the garage. hmmm???? The wall units are still in the spare room...I have a to do list a mile long for Eric...and guess who is going South in two weeks...him!...okay I may go to it was fun to just visit who I wanted. Sleep when I wanted and hike with my dog. Discovered the trail to Diamond Creek has a road to the trail head...the trail was an easy hike and Mac did a great job of staying on alert and not running off. He is a natural to the leash...he tries at first to resist..but complies when he realizes it is what it is. The second night I pulled into the HITW and noted the loneliness of the camp. Not wanting the disturb the guest at the Eagles nest I left my light off while entering my trailer to heat water to wash up. I was taken by surprise by a 6ft intruder but I swung first... and taped his pore nose back on when I got home. I assaulted a paper-mache' snowman. Mom must have sat him on the counter when she was cleaning up and storing stuff...In the dark...well lets just say...don't ever surprise me. Returning to the Yukon I prepared for bedding down and re writing an article when I realized how dark it was. I also thought about the light on and being a fish in a bowel...lets just say with out mom and dad on the hill...that place is creepy and Arnie is near. Awakening the next morning I attempted to open the door. My dog grabbed my arm and would not let me...thinking he wanted to play I roughed him up a bit and went for the door handle as I needed to get out....he again grabbed my arm...this is when I heard the earth tumble down the slope behind my trailer. I then saw the three bears...ambling down the remaining hill the mama heard Mac barking. She spared us a glance and lumbered over to the Kroc pond in attempts of catching any remaining crocs. She did not seem discouraged to find the pond iced over and knew her way to the Moose Wallow. It did not take her long to discover the moose had moved on although the cubs found the canopy quite entertaining I do believe they vetoed it for winter hibernation. The Duck House was investigated a bit closer but soon she realized the ducks too had flown south. Meeting the cubs at the fire pit they played a bit with the grill and wood...checked out the gazebo...and soon found the cook tent...now this may be an option for her winter den. She unzipped the zipper with her snout it was obvious she knew how and where to find the entrance...her and the cubs were in the tent for a while before the romped off past the bear den and up the hill. I waited, drove to the end of the driveway to relieve myself and returned to check out the cook tent. Nothing was disturbed, it appeared, I am not sure why she was in there so long but I zipped it closed retreated to my Yukon and again headed to Homer for coffee at KBay. Todays schedule...lunch with Jack and Wanda...a stop to see Grandma between students and a trip up West Hill...(Grandma said Grandpa would be sad if I did not go up and see him)...I had planned on it anyway with mom out of town but she guilted me so I prioritized it. Then I went on a walk down a trail that "used" to exist but no longer is or was...and found the beach below our Bay Crest House...that is on the market for FOUR HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS!!! I would ask for a "structural inspection" before I would pay anything for that house...but the asking amount is astronomical!! So after my walk I again headed for Anchor Point and a quick stop at the beach...I wanted to do a river walk...but the State has blocked off ALL the camp grounds and parking lots. It was getting late but I figured I could be creeped out in the HITW or I could be creeped out somewhere on the way home...I opted to try something new. Leaving Anchor Point sometime around 1830 (hehe see dad I can do it too) I had good roads and made it to Sterrling in about an hour and a half...this is when I found the wind...it was slow driving through the flats and Cooper Landing...thought about stopping at Russian River for the night but decided to go on to Tern Lake and sleep with the swans...well the State closed that one too! So I hit the cut off and headed up the pass...now the snow begins...before I made it to the Sterrling Seward junction it was almost "white out" conditions. Traveling at about 5 miles an hour I worked my way up the mountain and watched for the pull off there at the junction...the one with the little lake...I heard the waterfall and slowed down...I saw the pull off after passing it and backed in...I was soon joined by two semi trucks one coming from below and one above...both stating the weather sucked either way....they had us pull our cars behind them to protect us from sliding traffic should anyone lose it on the corner...leaving their lights on to attract others one proceeded to start a BBQ. Someone else had burgers and dogs...soon we were feasting in a blizzard...only in Alaska! I crawled into my Yukon to sleep till day light. When I awoke I was alone and the snow had stopped. It was 4am and I heard the plow. Decided to sleep longer...soon the sander woke me...he was going down the mountain...I returned my head to my pillow. When the next sander passed...heading North...I quickly let Mac do his thing...and we headed off at an agonizingly slow rate of speed behind the sander. Two and a half hours later I pulled into Girdwood for coffee...seems only in Anchorage can you get a cup of coffee when ever you want in the morning. I bought a paper, found a place on the arm to watch the sun finish rising and procrastinated my return home. So now I have done it once...I promise I will do it again. If we had just one cabin at the HITW we could take turns coming down a few at a time once a month or so all winter long. Although I do not mind sleeping in my Yukon...it uses little gas even when left on all night...but to bring the kids...well... Anyway...my little adventure is at an end...all is well in Homer...Grandma Mary has driven her new car out of the garage...not to town yet but out of the garage...seems the modern technology is intimidating and the manual is long and hard to learn...but she will soon be sporting her new Subaru. Grandpa was well. He is having a battle over the bird feeders with a black bear but I am sure he will win. And for a man who never gets to see wild life anymore...a black bear a window away well...I am sure he can see that!! Shane too is battling a bear who loves to steal his stuff from the back of his truck. Seems they are a little frisky this time of year. I want one too!!! It was weird visiting Anchor Point and Homer and not seeing mom and dad. I missed dad having coffee with me all day...and mom be bopping up and down the hill all day...I am glad they are having fun...but I sure missed them (and I could blame none of the scary noises on dad!). It was weird not having anyone to "get ready" in the morning or "cater to" during the day. Sleep when I wanted...funny I opted a walk over a nap...easy with no little ones. Probably be going back in two weeks...when does mommy get home????? I miss my mommy!!! Dutch and Dad too...thanks for reading my book....wish I had a camera....Toodles:)

Parental Ooops!!

A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, "Mom, what's sex?" His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject. When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had brought home from school and said, "Yes, but how am I going to get all that into this one little square?" **This picture has absolutely nothing to do with the joke...but it is a funny site when your driving down the roads of sheep country.....

Basic Math Lesson Gone Bad

A little boy is in school working on his arithmetic. The teacher says, "Imagine there are 5 black birds sitting on a fence. You pick up your BB gun and shoot one. How many blackbirds are left?" The little boy thinks for a moment and says, "NONE!" The teacher replies, "None, how do you figure that?" The little boy says, if I shoot one, all the other birds will fly away scared, leaving none on the fence." The teacher replies, "Hmm, not exactly, but I do like the way you think!" The little boy then says, "Teacher, let me ask you a question. There are 3 women sitting on a park bench eating ice cream cones. One is licking her cone, another is biting it and the third one is sucking it. How can you tell which one of the women is married?" The teacher ponders the question uncomfortably and then finally replies, "Well, I guess the one sucking her cone." To which the little boy replies, "Actually, its the one with the wedding ring, but I do like the way YOU think!"

The Knob....(thanks Tab!)

A MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN WENT TO A PLASTIC SURGEON FOR A FACE-LIFT. THE SURGEON TOLD HER ABOUT A NEW PROCEDURE CALLED "THE KNOB", WHERE A SMALL KNOB IS PLACED ON THE TOP OF A WOMAN'S HEAD AND CAN BE TURNED TO TIGHTEN UP HER SKIN TO PRODUCE THE EFFECT OF A BRAND NEW FACELIFT. OF COURSE THE WOMAN WANTED "THE KNOB". OVER THE COURSE OF THE YEARS, THE WOMAN TIGHTENED THE KNOB, AND THE EFFECTS WERE WONDERFUL, THE WOMAN REMAINED YOUNG LOOKING AND VIBRANT. AFTER FIFTEEN YEARS, THE WOMAN RETURNED TO THE SURGEON WITH TWO PROBLEMS. "ALL OF THESE YEARS,EVERYTHING HAS BEEN WORKING JUST FINE. I'VE HAD TO TURN THE KNOB MANY TIMES AND I'VE ALWAYS LOVED THE RESULTS. BUT NOW I' VE DEVELOPED TWO ANNOYING PROBLEMS: FIRST, I HAVE THESE TERRIBLE BAGS UNDER MY EYES AND THE KNOB WONT GET RID OF THEM." THE DOCTOR LOOKED AT HER CLOSELY AND SAID "THOSE AREN'T BAGS, THOSE ARE YOUR BREASTS." SHE SAID, "WELL I GUESS THERE'S NO POINT IN ASKING ABOUT THE GOATEE!

With the crooked politicians in Alaska of course the Bridge to No Where would wined up like this. Bet someone is unemployed.

DAD NEEDS A LAP TOP!

Oh what am I gonna do. Heidi at work, Dad on vacation, Bill in Iraq, John...who knows where he went! Shane needs to ask Santa for internet for Christmas, Eric is never home long enough. Blogger land is soooooo, boooorrrrring. but..... If dad gets a lap top, I will a virtual vacation..... MOM BUY DAD A LAP TOP PLEASE!

Mars and Venus

Thought for the day.