Thursday, April 10, 2008

Seems Weird to me

All my life I have felt on the outside looking in. Now more than ever. Seems everyone I have ever known has only taken what they can see. No one has ever spent any time really getting to know me for who I am. This used to hurt dearly. Now I find it is only loneliness that bothers me. But a loneliness I will suffer as I am sure Jesus often felt the same way. My question is...Why does everyone in this world try so hard to disprove HIM....or ignore him for those that say they have the LORD in their lives. Why? fear? This bothers me as I have often been isolated from this world due to my faith in the LORD. Again a problem I am sure many have had, unfortunately I have never met anyone that seems to use faith as a way to live daily life. Most worry about money, yes a worry we all have, but through my faith I have never went without what my family needs to live. We have never had extra and that is ok. Extra means more work for a house wife who is already over loaded trying to spend time with children and educate them in the things the school district does not or can not.

My faith in the LORD Jesus started way before I can remember Church or anyone but my Uncle Cliff talking about GOD and prayer. Everyone else seems afraid. My Uncle used to sit with me on his lap, on his front porch. We would watch the storms come over the prairie and he would talk to me about the good LORD JESUS and everything he promised us. No more pain, no more suffering, no more anger and no more greed. How could one not want this? Uncle Cliff was the first in my life his family prayed before meals, they prayed at night, and they prayed just to pray. I loved that it felt like someone out there even bigger than anyone could and would take care of me.

Many years later I met a family in our neighborhood. I looked forward to vacation BIBLE school at their home. The beautiful songs and stories captivated my young heart and imagination. One summer these people sat me on their laps and prayed with me. They asked JESUS to take care of me and guide me through life. He never left me. I left him for awhile, but now I know why.

As the years went by I never quit watching for JESUS to come. I knew then and I do now that this world will never be a place of love and happiness for all until JESUS comes back. All governments and religions think they are right and everyone else is wrong. When it really is quite simple. Believe and have faith, happiness comes from with in not from something we can buy at the store and dispose of in a trash dump when we are done with it. Be kind to our brothers. This does not mean our family only....brothers means everyone in this world not just those that follow our government and religion. Forgive those that do us wrong and move on. Forgiveness a very tough thing for man kind to admit as that would mean we might be wrong.

Now many do not follow religion, but I always have. Many don't know how to survive without money. I never became dependent on it. Yes it makes me unhappy to not have enough to pay the bills but never have I felt the need for more so I could buy a fancy car and keep up with the Jones. In fact I always thought individualism was much more important.

As I sit here and wonder why I have developed the plague the answer comes to me...My FAITH. I am sorry others do not want to know the real me, just the one they want me to be. Now I know that is what has made me unhappy most of my life. Trying to be what everyone else thinks I should be when really I am just a faithful servant of the LORD. I believe in good over evil and I believe that JESUS will return soon and he will take over this world and make it a better place. I will stand by that faith no matter how lonely I get as I have never really had anyone but HIM by my side for most of my life. I have disappointed him, I have strayed from the path, but I have never given up my gift of prayer, as I believe and have seen that prayers can and are answered if the heart if true to the LORD.

Comments on "Seems Weird to me"


Blogger Kiana said ... (11:59 PM) : 

"let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds,not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near." ~ Hebrews 10:24-25

There are lots who believe, from very nice people all the way to the other side of the scale - satan. It's Followers of Christ who can encourage you and will never look on you as if you have a "plague". We are to draw our strength from our brothers and sisters in Christ in order to be strong out there in the world. And of course give encouragement in return.

Worshiping Him isn't the only great thing about meeting with a church family, as the verse goes into above. I know you've had bad experiences with churches in the past but I have found that no two churches out there are the same. Keep trying.

It's great to see a post with so much pride in Christ, ya got my vote!


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